What Really Grinds My Gears: Bouncers Who Can't Do Basic Math

Ok so I took a few days off but I'm back. It really took everything in my power not to do a Cooper based posting...at this point hes just asking for it. I actually had one written out but I determined I can't do it without it getting to a point where Cooper might kill himself or run away to South America to start life over as a sheep herder. That being said, let me get to these fucking bouncers. Clearly they are a necessity, especially when dealing with a bunch of dumb ass college kids in the middle of Worcester. BUT, there should be more of a requirement then just looking like Perm with a giant beard and a shit ton of tats. Basic math should be right up there on the list.


Let me paint a scene for you. Last night, I'm waiting in line to get in the fucking Greyhound Bar in Kelly square. Yup..there was a line for that place. Fucking Holy Cross kids. Anyways, I get you have to keep things all up to code so you don't get shut down and you don't have Tom bursting in the place telling you why the joint is a fire hazard. Anywho, after like 20 minutes in the freezing cold, 4 kids finally leave the place. I'm thinking to myself, hell muthafuckingyea, our group has four people! We're in! Apparently not..... To quote Coop-stain, "really? really? seriously? Whats the logistical reasoning behind this?" Apparently in retarded bouncer math, 4 does not equal 4.... We literally waited another 10 minutes to just get in. In that time even more people left. So apparently according to this guys math, its something like 4+3-2 raised to the 6th power = 4. Yea...I can only assume this guys mom still has his 3rd grade math test up on the fridge. Pfffft guy was lucky Evan was there to hold me back, I would have been all over him like a spider monkey! I'm all jacked up on mountain Dew!....yea I wouldn't have fought the bouncer...

Essentially this sums up my night....Emilioooooooooooooooo!


And that's what really grinds my gears......