Need Less: Professional Drivers on a Closed Course

We all know this phrase from the car commercials we see on TV. But just think about how absurd it is. I mean do people actually need their pick-up trucks to tow 10,000 pounds up a flaming ramp? And what the hell are you supposed to do once you get to the top? I know I'm going after that dick who turned on the gas and started the fire. That was uncalled for 'bro.

If I happen to come across this life or death situation and I absolutely needed to get to the top of this random structure in the middle of the desert, then I'll make sure I call someone who owns a Toyota Tundra. Because obviously Chevy, GMC and Ford don't engineer their trucks to be able to do this. Tundra owners must have complained and run across this situation so many times that Toyota decided to step up and say, "You know what, let's make a truck that can do this. And the commercial will be awesome because people will see how bad-ass our trucks are."

Or they're just complete dumb-asses and think people actually want to buy these trucks because they can do all this cool shit. You can drive up this crazy ramp in the middle of the no where, but if you're looking for a truck that can function in the city or on highways then you're fucked.


Here's another gem. Wow, your Tundra can tow 10,000 pounds on a ramp high off the ground and in front of several high-powered fans? That must be a real panty dropper. If you ever need to get your truck across this random bridge (once again in the middle of a desert), and you don't own a Tundra, then just shut off the fans. Why are they even on in the first place? I bet it was that same asshole who decided the ramp needed to be a-blaze.

Look I get that these ads are a metaphor to show what the truck can do and how powerful it is, but they're just so absurd. Why not show a real situation that this truck might actually encounter? Or talk about it's awesome features in a slightly less over-the-top way. It really makes you wonder how people were able to cross the country a couple hundred years ago. I guess they didn't have fan-bridges and fire-ramps back then.

And what's with this guy's voice? Must have been a smoker.