Need Less: People who roll up their sweatshirt sleeves

I'm baaaccckkkkk! Are people done writing about the same things as me? Is it safe to blog again? Alright I apologize and I'm done.

Now that we've cleared that up, let me enlighten you. We could definitely use less rolling up of the sweatshirt sleeves and/or sweatshirt sleeves that go above the elbow. (Disclaimer: this does not apply to a subtle sweatshirt pulling up of the sleeves. I'll allow that for a max of 3-5 inches above the wrist.)

What's the point of wearing a sweatshirt if you're going to roll the sleeves up? It's a garment designed to bring you warmth and you just exposed half of your arms. You'll get especially cold if you happen to shave your arms, which is just weird anyway. Who does that!

To examine this phenomenon, let's try to get inside the mind of a sweatshirt-roller-upper. It's a brisk day in the spring or possibly the fall. You have a general distrust of meteorologists, and aren't sure to wear short sleeves or long sleeves. God-for-fucking-bid if you're ever too cold or too hot Goldilocks.

In a quest to attain the perfect temperature on your day out on the town, you decide to wear a sweatshirt, with apparently nothing else underneath it. The day starts off great and you're rubbing it in everyone else's face because they wore T-shirts and are too cold. Then as noon approaches it gets warm, and you start to develop mild perspiration on your forehead. Possibly a case of SWASS. What to do now? Well since you didn't wear a T-shirt under you sweatshirt, because that was too difficult and would throw off your perfect system, you roll up your sweatshirt sleeves and end up looking like a huge asshole.

Speaking of assholes some of you might be wondering what if you need to do an emergency artificial insemination on a horse (saw it on Dirty Jobs one time, no more questions please) and you happen to only be wearing a sweatshirt? Wouldn't you want to roll up your sleeves and not get them dirty?

No. Not even acceptable then.

Why? Because if this situation just happens to come up for some reason (and I have absolutely no idea why it would) just take your sweatshirt off. It's not sewn to your skin (and if it is then you have other problems to address).

And trust me, no one will be asking why you're not wearing a shirt. They'll be wondering why you're elbow deep in a horse's ass.

This guy knows what I’m talking about